Anger is a tough nut. It is neither right nor wrong. Anger can fuel us. Many an injustice in human history has been righted by justifiable anger. Even the holy books record their heroes being angry, such as Jesus taking up a whip and chasing merchants from the Temple. It’s what we do with our anger that matters. First, though, we need to be aware of it. We need to have an inner radar which alerts us to anger brewing within us. Once we cop on that we are angry, we then need to try to discern what we are annoyed about. Sometimes the ‘presenting’ issue isn’t the real issue. For instance, if I find myself snapping at my children it is often that I was angry beforehand and it’s important that we trace back to the original source. Happily I’m of an age that I readily apologise to my children and I’ll say: ‘Sorry. It’s something else I’m annoyed about.’

Now that we backtrack to the original cause of our disquiet, irritation, displeasure, annoyance – all politer words for the one emotion of anger – we can at least deal with the actual issue. We need to deal with our anger or it will deal with us. We need to have our anger or it will have us. We need to own it or it will own us.

Some people are irredeemably irritating to work with. They will never change. I refer again, as I think I did before, to a gorgeous piece of calligraphy on a simple card that I have on the wall of my office. One line says: ‘Have nothing to do with people who put you down, depress you or say you cannot do it.’ (The only attribution is ‘Your Philosophy’)

Life is too short to become embroiled with dysfunctional people.  And yet why do so many people remain in relationships, whether personal or professional, with people who do just that: depress them, put them down and say they cannot do it? It is surely fear, a bedfellow of anger. We may fear what may happen if we walk away. We need to have faith in ourselves. I have walked away from situations in the past that cramped me, depressed me and disrespected me. We can but speak our truth. And if no change results, we need to trust ourselves enough to walk away.